Gracious: A Practical Primer on Charm, Tact, and Unsinkable Strength

Back in graduate school, I began reading a blog, Adulting, by Kelly Williams Brown. A few years later, she published the book Adulting: How to Become a Grown-Up in 468 Easy(ish) Steps. Recently, her second book Gracious was released. Throughout the book, she provides tips on how to deal with the people and circumstances that challenge even the most socially graceful among us, advice on how to practice graciousness in everyday life, and thoughtful discussions on being kind to those around you without ever losing your sense of self.

This was my airplane book that I read while flying to and from Colorado. For me, the most relatable chapters were "Gracious In, Around & Generally Regarding the Home" and "The Gracious Host & Hosted." In this blog post, I will just provide some notions that can help you think about living a more gracious life.

Gracious In, Around & Generally Regarding the Home

• Learn how to be reasonably tidy by providing definitive answers for the following for every object in your house:
• Do I love this?
• Why do I let this remain in my personal space?
• Where does this item live?
• Adjectives that Do and Do Not apply to a gracious home:
• Yes: welcoming, cared for, tidy, comfortable, lived in, full of interesting things
• No: spotless, minimalist, sterile, intimidating, hoardery, sticky, oppressively Pinterest-y
• Useful Dining Tips:
• It's immeasurably better to start eating 20 seconds later than everyone than 5 minutes before. Unless instructed otherwise, you should not start eating until everyone is seated, everyone is served, and the host picks up his or her fork.
• Napkins go in your lap as soon as possible.
• Touch both your index fingers to your thumbs. On your left , you will see a lowercase b, which stands for bread plate, and on your right is a lowercase d for drinks. Your bread plate is to your left, and your drinks to your right.
• There may be implements on the table for every course, just start with the ones outside and work your way in.
• Generally speaking, implements are arranged with forks on the left, then a plate, then knives, then spoons. FO(r)KS as an acronym: Forks, O (for a plate) Knives, Spoons.
• If you are not done with a course, your utensils should rest on either side of your plate. When you are done, the two utensils are set parallel to each other and pointing NW on the plate.
• Never go on vacation without taking all the garbage outside.